Finally. This beautiful feeling of being somehow 'free' is back. I miss this feeling. It magically came the moment I heard the call of Maghrib prayer yesterday. I took a deep breath of the new month of Ramadhan, and I could feel my heart crying with joy, my lungs feeling excited. I cried invisible tears of happiness, of gratitude. Alhamdulillah.
I didn't know if I was ever going to meet Ramadhan again. Last Ramadhan was my 'realization' moment. I finally realized how beautiful the month really was, how it was the perfect opportunity to do many wonderful deeds and it was a huge avenue to earn a ticket to Jannah.
Unfortunately since last Ramadhan, I think I started to forget. I started to slowly leave some of the good habits. I was a better person than the previous Ramadhan, no doubt. But it was as if I had walked a mile forward and decided to walk back a third of the way. It was only yesterday did I realize how uncool it was, and how it was a huge waste. I'm not going to let that happen again.
Allah gives us all thousands of opportunities each day to prove to Him that we do deserve to be in Jannah. He has unlimited rewards that He just WANTS to give to us, but we need to earn it first. Despite all of the sins and mistakes I made, all the good habits I left, Allah still gave me the chance to repent, by giving me another Ramadhan, or even another day to live.
The moment all the syaitan and devils got locked up again, I felt calm, safe and secure.
I want to change. I want my faith to be at it's highest this Ramadhan, the most it has ever been for as long as I've lived. I want that to stay within me and keep building and increasing even after Ramadhan. This could be my last Ramadhan, I CAN'T waste it. This is the chance for me to renew myself, to ask for forgiveness from Allah. This is the chance to earn countless of rewards and to eliminate my past sins.
I know that I won't be the only one who takes this advantage to change into a better person, a better servant. I can already see some people who seemed a little lost before see the beauty and opportunities that Allah offers and with their own intuition, they want to change too. Alhamdulillah, the beauty of Ramadhan. Truly a month full of blessings.
I hope through Ramadhan, I can strengthen my bond with my friends and family, after doing so with Allah of course :) I hope the spirit I have for this beautiful month won't only last for a few days, but for the rest of my life. InsyaAllah, let's pray for each other :)
Have a wonderful Ramadhan everyone :D
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